My new title: Windshield Wiper

I had to make a trip to the bank the other day to take out some money. It was one of those rare days that I got to drive the truck rather than being driven by my chauffer. Yes, I have one of those.

My record continues in the context of my very presence destroying every working part of the vehicles I drive. Although it is NOT yet rainy season, it poured cats and dogs that day and alas, my wipers would not turn on. I had to take off the shorts I had on under my skirt and stop every 50 yards to wipe the windshield. Then I tried to have one of my Haitian workers lean over the cab and wipe it while I drove......with my shorts. That didn't make things any easier because he could only reach the top four inches.

So I stopped in the middle of who-knows-where with Haitians in a dirt-and-stick hut all yelling "Give me one dolla! Give me one dolla!" at me. They laughed as I ripped a bush from the ground, stripped it bare and tied my detached wiper blade to it with my key lanyard.

I drove for an hour wiping the rain from my own windshield with my left arm out the window, shifting up and down over the "roads", steering and honking as I passed the other trucks, which is a must here in Haitiland.

I was just waiting til we hit the paved road and I could stop shifting so often, but as soon as we hit the paved road, and I mean the VERY SECOND we hit it, God had a good laugh and stopped the rain.

Hilarious.